To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
