Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I just found a bag of teeth...
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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