i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
