I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
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