Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
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