You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
