I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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