Is it normal to miss your booty call?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
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