take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
