is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
