Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize