D3 body, D1 cock
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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