Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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