so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
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