butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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