Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
