Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
