bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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