She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
