He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
