well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
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just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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