Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize