is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
