I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
My friends, they love my intelligence
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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