Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
fuck your aforementioned shoe
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
