The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
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