did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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