found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
