True but thats because hes a fetus.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
