Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
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