Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
Well my cheeks are red now
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys