But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
tell your sister to shave her snatch
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
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