i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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