Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize