You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
