The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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