I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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