He told me they were just razor bumps!
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
