The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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