Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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