the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
