windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
