i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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