she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize