Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
