wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
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