The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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