but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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