escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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