Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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