So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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