As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
